Three years ago my middle son's father lost his dad to the abuse his body suffered from his addictions. his kidneys and liver shut down. He was on meds but when they ran out he didn't bother to get any more. He had just buried his father when he was hospitalized. I think he just didn't want to live sick anymore.I was married to my husband when this happened. He was also an addict..he always said he was scared to die the same way Chris did but he thought he would because he was an alcoholic and addicited to pain pills. he would take 10-12 loritab at a time.I warned him of what it would do to him. We started doin heroin. Did it 6 months then quit, He got suboxone and that worked til he got laid off and lost his insurance.We went back to using heroin again.One night we got some that was real strong.The last thing he said to me was "here take this(his syringe)I think I did too much. He went to the bathroomand sat on the toilet. he fell off o to the floor. The heroin had stopped his heart. We later found out that he had 2 heart conditions.I continued to use for 6 more months. I quit last december.I started usiong morphine. Went to rehab in March then to outpatient classes. i was doin well then relapsed. I have hidden the relapse.trying not to go back to active using. Its hard raising two boys without any help.I am trying to be strong and tell myself I cant let this disease take me too.These boys cant be left alone on their own. Glad to have found this site and have the support of others to show me the right way to live.